Death…Hollywood Style!

By: Andrew Mahon, David Miller, Kenneth Reed, Michelle Stutzman, Patrick Stutzman, Karen Thronebury, and Trampas Whiteman.

You’re facing the Big Bad End Guy, and have him down to just a few hit points. One more thrust of the sword, and he dies. You have been waiting all night for this moment! You thust your sword and…he falls down.

What? That’s it? Epic fail! That’s not the way it should have ended. There should be an epic ending, something straight out of Hollywood.

That’s what “Death…Hollywood Style!” is all about. Now you can add a little Hollywood style action to your game the next time a character dies. But beware, as that character may be yours! Be warned, as well, that the authors who created this chart may not be all right in the head.

So grab those percentile dice and roll. Someone is going down!

Disclaimer: Some adult language and tons of bad puns below. You have been warned.

d%

Effect

01 PC cuts off victim’s head and says, “There can be only one!”
02 Everything occurs in slow motion.
03 Out of nowhere, 1d100 bullets fly into the body’s chest.
04 Victim looks at death wound in a stupid manner, and then keels over.
05 Body completely spins around, then crumbles to the ground.
06 Explosion under body propels it upwards to a maximum of 2d10 feet.
07 Lifeless body staggers around for 1d100 rounds, or until knocked down.
08 The near-lifeless body screams out in pain very loudly, then dies.
09 The dead body crumbles to the ground like a rag doll.
10 Victim clutches its face in agony, then dies.
11 A random limb falls off :

1d4
Limb
1
Left Arm
2
Right Arm
3
Left Leg
4
Right Leg

Special: A DM who was slighted on cheezy puffs for the night may opt to have the head fall off instead.

12 The body flies backwards until it hits a wall.
13 Victim gets impaled on nearest sharp object.
14 The body is reduced to a puddle of ooze, which seeps into the nearest hole.
15 Body sways on feet for 1d4 rounds, then falls backwards.
16 Victim laughs for 1d4 rounds, then dies.
17 The body blows up into 1d100 pieces.
18 The body spews out 1d8 pints of blood, then dies.
19 The sound of the death blow is amplified 10 times.
20 The body flips over backwards and lands on stomach.
21 The body flies backwards through a window.
22 The dead body falls off the nearest cliff. If a cliff is not nearby, one mystically appears behind it.
23 Everything dead and/or inanimate explodes.
24 Victim hunches over in slow motion, spits blood everywhere, and falls over while clutching its stomach.
25 Everyone falls over.
26 Body flies up into the sky, falls back down , bounces twice, and then dies.
27 Mystic letters spelling out the sound of the death blow appear above the dead body as soon as it occurs.
28 Victim bites a bullet…literally.
29 Victim kicks a bucket…literally.
30 Victims buys a farm…literally.
31 Victim picks up a pile of dog crap, eats it and dies.
32 The dead body disintegrates into thin air.
33 The body falls backwards into an already-dug grave.
34 Victim grows old, then dies.
35 An atomic blast fills the immediate area, only destroying the body.
36 Laser blasts fill the area, destroying every non-living object.
37 The victim eats its own heart, then dies.
38 The near-lifeless body flies into a black hole while screaming.
39 The dead body falls out of a mystical exploding building.
40 An invisible car runs over the dead body, leaving tire tracks.
41 A huge foot appears in the sky and stomps dead body.
42 Body gets run over by a large, screaming crowd.
43 The almost-dead victim has a heart attack.
44 An alien bursts out of the body and sings “Ragtime Gal”.
45 A super-neato blast engulfs the dead body.
46 The body spontaneously combusts.
47 Everyone stares dumbly at dead body for 1d4 rounds.
48 The body falls upwards, hits a cloud, and falls back down.
49 Victim bursts into flame and runs out of a burning car.
50 A doctor appears beside the body and exclaims “He’s dead, Jim!’
51 The victim spouts off Shakespearean dialogue for 1d4 turns, then dies.
52 Victim turns into a liquid metal and seeps into the ground.
53 Victim is splashed by water and starts melting while screeching, “I’m melting!”
54 Victim’s skull and spine are ripped from its body while a mystic voice says, “Fatality!”
55 A witch doctor appears in front of the victim, reaches into his chest, and pulls out the still-beating heart.
56 Victim dramatically yells out, “Freedom!” and gets head chopped off with an axe.
57 Arnold Schwarzenegger appears in front of victim and says and does the following:

1d8
Result
1
“Relax. You’ve been erased!” A giant eraser descends from sky and erases victim.
2
“Prepare to be terminated!” and shoots victim.
3
“Stick around!” Pins victim to tree with knife.
4
“Big mistake!” and shoots missile at victim.
5 “You’re fired!” and roasts victim with flame-thrower.
6 “Hasta la vista, baby!” and fires grenade launcher at victim.
7 “Consider this a divorce!” and hits victim in privates.
8 “It’s not a tumor!” and rips victim’s head off.
58 Sylvester Stallone appears in front of victim and says and does the following:

1d6
Result
1
“Court is adjourned!” and shoots victim.
2
“Adrian!” and punches victim.
3
“Mission…accomplished.” and stabs victim with neato Rambo knife.
4
“I’m your worst nightmare!” and shoots victim with super-groovy exploding arrow.
5 “I am the law!” and shoots victim with ultra-toxic Judge Dredd gun.
6 “Yo!” and jumps back into boxing ring with victim.
59 Victim turns into mime then gets smashed by 1d10 ACME anvils.
60 A little red-haired girl runs out of nowhere and hugs victim to death.
61 A man appears, pushes thumb and forefinger together while saying, “I crush your head!” The victim’s head is then crushed.
62 A white vorpal bunny appears and rips victim’s throat out.
63 A big purple dinosaur arrives and starts singing, “I love you, you love me…” and victim commits suicide.

1d6
Result
1
Shoots self.
2
Stabs self.
3
Hangs self.
4
Burns self.
5 Slits wrists.
6 Poisons self.
64 Victim discovers he’s the only one in the party wearing a red shirt, screams in horror, and falls over dead.
65 Victim is stabbed to death in a shower while Psycho music is playing.
66 Everyone hears tribal drums, and victim gets trampled by stampede.
67 A gangster jumps out, states “It’s coitins for ya! Coitins!” and hands a set of curtains to the near- lifeless body, which then dies.

1d8
Curtain Type
1
Pink Polka-Dot
2
Plaid
3
Paisley
4
Blue Butterfly
5 Holstein Cow Pattern
6 Pastel Green
7 Corduroy
8 Lace
68 A random Simpsons character appears and does the following:

1d6
Result
1
Homer appears and says, “Doh!”
2
Nelson appears and says, “Ha ha!”
3
Burns appears and says, “Excellent!”
4
Marge appears and growls.
5 Bart appears and says, “I didn’t do it, nobody saw me do it, you can’t prove anything!”
6 Homer appears and yells, “While you little…” and strangles victim.
69 The body turns into a human-sized, Godzilla-like creature, which falls over and crushes a bunch of miniature buildings while tiny Japanese people run in large crowds away from destruction.
70 A polished-silver ball flies from out of nowhere, extends a small blade and impales itself into the victim’s forehead.
71 A psychopath wearing a hockey mask runs out of the woods and stabs the dead body.
72 A crazed chainsaw-wielding maniac wearing a human-skin mask hacks victim to pieces.
73 Victim appears in a damaged X-Wing Fighter, rapidly flying towards the ground. A voice can be overheard saying, “Eject! Eject!” The victim replies, “No, I can handle it!” The voice returns, “Eject!”. Suddenly, the fighter hits the ground and explodes.
74 An emergency room team of doctors appears and futilely attempt to revive body while yelling “Clear!”
75 The victim walks up to a chain-link fence and grabs hold when a nuclear blast goes off miles away. The body starts to burn, when it starts shaking violently while maintaining its hold on the fence.
76 The words “To be continued…All gamers take 15 minute intermission.” mystically appear in the air over the body.
77 Victim is shot, his body flying back against a wall and forming pop art.
78 Victim dies “Buffy the Vampire Slayer” movie style, making death groans for 1d20 turns.
79 Bovine Intervention: A giant cow falls from the sky, crushing the victim.
80 Victim says, “You slay me!” and dies.
81 PC kills victim and says, “Yippie-kai-yay, mother-fucker!”
82 PC kills victim and says, “Yippie-kai-yay, Mister Falcon!” (safe for nework TV version)
83 A wooden stake is driven through the victim’s heart. The victim explodes.
84 A thunderstorm magically appears over the victim, who is struck by lightning.
85 Victim’s heart is dug out with a spoon.
86 The victim instantly freezes into a block of ice, and then crumbles.
87 A giant whale jumps over the victim, and then falls on him, crushing him.
88 Victim is seen with his mother. Dies of embarrassment.
89 Victim is thrown into the Great Pit of Carkoon, where he will be slowly digested by the sarlacc for a thousand years.
90 Victim is trampled by a stampede of cattle.
91 Giant boulder rolls over victim.
92 An abominable snowman grabs victim, hugs him, and says, “I’ll hold him and hug him and squeeze him and I’ll name him George!” Victim is crushed.
93 Victim is put into an electric chair and fried to a crisp.
94 Cops arrive on the scene to make chalk outline of the victim.
95 Victim says, “I’m like a leaf on the wind,” and is impaled.
96 Roll twice, ignoring results between 96-100.
97 Roll three times, ignoring results between 96-100.
98 Roll four times, ignoring results between 96-100.
99 Roll five times, ignoring results between 96-100.
100 The victim rises, fully restored to full hit points, and says, “To Hell with this. I’m gonna live!”

Acknowledgements:

“Death…Hollywood Style!” was a collaborative chart designed by my college gaming group, with the intention of making character death fun. The document was in its early stages when I joined the group, and saw further evolution as time went on. Later on, I worked on creating what I considered the definitive “special edition” of this chart. It is to my friends, the crew of the Starspeed, that this article is dedicated.

-Trampas Whiteman

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